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The bodybuilding world is filled with some seriously shady characters and Keef Conman was probably one of the shadiest I have ever met. Given the competition this was no mean feat and his exploits were already semi-legendary in that corner of the north-east of England.

Take for example his gym - easily the best gymnasium I have ever trained at - which had, right at the back end of the 90’s, recently relocated to the first floor of an industrial unit only a 15 minute or so walk up the road. This was a necessary and long overdue move as the prior building where the gym had been situated was becoming ever more unsafe to use. There were only so many times that Keef could warn bodybuilders not to drop their weights on the floor (as, in certain parts of the gym, those weights would simply crash though the floor and end up in the storey below) before even he was forced to move in an attempt to avoid prosecution by the local council.

The new gym was structurally safer (always reassuring when you’re lying under a heavy bench press weight) although the overall environment was…“interesting” to say the least.

There’s not too many businesses that I have walked into the reception area of only to be repeatedly greeted by the sight of a large TV screen playing various pornographic videos.

Keef would always pop up from behind the counter laughing and pointing at the screen and, with his usual patter, ask me, “now then my mate, what do you think of that?”

Every time without fail - videos of naked men in various naked women followed by Keef’s commentary. As regular as clockwork. An amusing start to any training session for sure.

The gym itself was perfect though. The weights, machines, training equipment, overall space and size and quality of the changing rooms far surpassed that of any gymnasium I have trained at before or since.

Hands down my favourite gym even to this present day which is why I was initially puzzled over one glaring anomaly.

I was almost always the only person training there - with the exception of one 68 year old male (apparently an ex-Olympic swimmer who I got to know quite well and I was always impressed to see him training hard and staying in shape).

At first I couldn’t figure out why there weren’t more people training at that gym given the space, size and facilities that were available.

This was a mystery to me until, through the course of conversation with the ex-Olympic swimmer, a clearer and more disturbing picture started to emerge.

Keef, by all accounts (and this would be corroborated by other sources - one of whom was absolutely unimpeachable), was not the brightest penny in the box. He had, so I was told, made his money through the launderette business and, prior to losing almost all of that through gambling and various gold diggers that he accumulated along the way, branched out into the gymnasium business.  As a former competitive bodybuilder you might think this was a sensible move as this was an industry he knew well.

You’d be wrong however.

His gymnasium was losing money hand over fist and, I was reliably informed, that he owed a lot of money to the bank as a result of his disastrous financial management of the business (I guess all those “investments” at the races hadn’t paid off after all…not to mention helping out various female leeches who’d simply taken the guy for a ride).

It seemed that many bodybuilders in the area knew that Conman’s gym was living on borrowed time and had simply migrated to other gymnasiums instead.

I felt bad for the guy on some levels - he wasn’t too bright, hadn’t managed his business and was surrounded by leeches. Take for example his sleazy looking crew of middle-aged male friends - all in their fifties and sixties with pot bellies and overly-tanned skin - who were almost always hanging around the reception area talking on their mobile phones with their “girlfriends” in Thailand.

I never felt comfortable with their presence - there was always a dirty, seedy and somewhat corrupted air about those guys (and I wonder, given their “relationships” with 20-something year old Thai girls, if they ever had the self-awareness to realise just how sad and pathetic they truly were…especially when it was almost a dead-cert that those girls would be “working girls”).

One of those guys took a certain pride in telling me that he made his living as a gigolo - hooking up with rich women and enjoying their money before moving onto the next victim. At first I thought he was spinning me a line but it became clear, as the conversation progressed, that he wasn’t. His confident air, self-satisfied demeanour and detached manner was proof positive. I was appalled at just how casually he relayed this to me and how there was no hint of self-disgust or remorse for his victims.

How someone could be so predatory and at ease with using people didn’t sit well with me then and now, half a lifetime later, it disgusts me even further.

Driven by appalling financial mismanagement and surrounded by such stellar company it was no surprise then that the gymnasium was looming ever closer to shutting its doors.

Sure enough that day came and I was saddened to turn up one afternoon and find the place locked and inaccessible - Conman’s gym was no longer open for business.

Ironically I would learn, later that week, from a very reliable source that Keef had managed to exceed even his own reputation for bad business practice. It transpired that Keef (in the full knowledge that he would be permanently closing his business) approached various gym owners in the city enquiring as to their interest in purchasing his equipment.

Sounds like a smart business move right? Wait…there’s more.

Keef only tried to subsequently sell equipment that he’d already sold to previous gym owners and then, the icing on the cake, he approached the local Police force and offered them a discounted annual membership deal shortly before he closed his business down and, whilst leaving behind his unpaid debts, ran off with his money to Thailand.

Ballsy for sure but definitely not bright nor right.

I have no idea what became of the guy, his crew of sleazy friends nor the ex-Olympic swimmer who I enjoyed talking with but even now I still miss that gym.

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